While traveling, people often use the phrase “going with the flow”.

But what does that even mean? Let’s dive into this….

Going with the flow is one of those phrases that people use as a form of self flattery. “I’m so chill I can just go with the flow!” or “I just go with the flow. That’s how not drama I am!” But let’s be honest… those who are self proclaimed goers of the flowers and drama haters are sometimes the MOST DRAMATIC PEOPLE WE KNOW! You know why? Well, I’ll tell ya.

Imagine we are all little water molecules that are going with the flow.

We are rushing to get to the same place as fast as we can. We bump into each other, go over each other, and are all up in each others business.

Now let’s become human again. Going with the flow you are essentially allowing yourself to get sucked up in other peoples flows aka messed upness. Creating your flow, on the other hand, has some major and important differences. It’s important to recognize these differences and adopt them because going with other peoples crazy flows only makes you crazy. Or maybe put you in a dangerous situation…?

Let us continue…. Creating your flow is when you find what, in life, brings you true joy. Who here has seen the movie “Runaway Bride”? Remember her whole conundrum of the eggs? Essentially, she’s almost been married a bunch of times and then this one guy, is like “what are your favorite eggs?” and she’s has no answer for him because she has always just adopted the favorite egg type of whoever she was with! In the end, he just calls her lost and she calls it changing her mind.

I guarantee that all of us have been in positions like these.

Whether it be with trying to please our parents with our academic pursuits even though you want to be a world renowned artist. Or your buddies by being a bully even though you’re naturally a tender and sweet person. Maybe your trying to impress your friends by doing drugs even though you really don’t enjoy it. Or maybe you are trying to please your significant other by getting rushed into their flow when it’s not really what you want but… you know… they’re really a good person or you’re the only person who understands them. 

Either way, you should know what you love and what makes you happy instead of what makes others happy and only doing that to please them.

I spent almost every dating relationship doing what the other wanted, being on their timeline, and not speaking up for myself because I didn’t want to hurt their precious feelings. I eventually dropped all pretenses when I met my now husband.

Pre-date number one I told him point blank what I expect out of relationships, what my non-negotiables were, and my timeline. Patrick was so wowed and appreciative of my straightforward honest and knowledge of myself, that he agreed to my things, shared his and dated we did! After traveling to five countries, eventually we wed!

That attitude we adopted extended much farther than dating timelines.

Patrick and I are most excellent at navigating the uncertain waters of traveling. More often than not, our plans are a bit foiled and we have to reevaluate our plans. And more often than not, what we end up doing turns out to be AMAZING!!!!

GO FORTH AND CREATE YOUR OWN FLOWS!

Enjoy life at your speed at your level on your terms!