Can a Mormon Marry a non-Mormon?

by admin January 13, 2020 Post Comment

Remember my last article about whether or not I, a Mormon woman, was allowed to date a non-Mormon man? If not, you should read it. Link is in that big red button below 🙂

Can a Mormon Date a Non-Mormon?

So can a Mormon marry a non-Mormon?

The short answer is a resounding yes!

A Mormon can marry a non-Mormon. The long answer is much longer because we have to cover why people think we can’t.

Why the cultural stereotype?

From what I understand, there is a stereotype that people cannot, neigh, will not marry outside of their belief or religious group. (aka the question “can a Mormon marry a non-Mormon?”

The reason I say belief group is because one time, last year while pregnant with our first inter-religious child (aka we were already married), I mentioned to a girl, who was spouting her very strong political religious opinions, that I’m glad that I, a strong right leaning Christian hippy was able to marry a strong left leaning non-Christian hippy because we create a balance.

This actually shocked her.

She couldn’t believe that two such different people would even want to make things work or would be willing to even try having a conversation.

And then there’re movies like “My Big Fat Greek Wedding”, the friends or family we know who had to convert to Catholicism to get married. Or friends (like me) who were broken up with because of our religion, and many other examples. So the stereotype is right!

Not only that there are people of various belief systems, political or religious, that simply won’t even socialize outside of their comfort zones. I attribute that to lack of confidence, fear of not being accepted, and general lack of understanding.

So why the stereotype around Mormons?

I’ll be honest. I’m not entirely sure why it seems people are more dubious about Mormons marrying outside their religion. Hold on while I ask Patrick….

Okay…Patrick thinks it’s because people know less about Mormons and we seem a bit more “culty”. He thinks we seem “culty” because it’s a relatively new religion. Older religions somehow seem more noble.

The real reason Mormons tend to not marry non-Mormons is because it is customary for us to marry in a temple. In order to get married in the temple, you both need to be members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. And you have to be a worthy and active member.

For those of you reading who are non-members, I’ve broached a lot of subjects in that last paragraph, namely temples, worthiness, and membership. In the interest of not writing a novel, I will have to address all of that later. But I have included a video produced by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints below. It briefly goes over the purpose of a temple. Watch. It’s excellent.

Neat video. Watch it! It’s not too long.

In the Church, we believe in Eternal Marriages.

We do not say “till death do us part” in our wedding ceremonies. We believe that death does not part a union made in a temple. Families are eternal.

A lot of us Mormons grow up dreaming of being married to our Eternal Companion in the temple and literally living happily forever and ever and ever and ever and ever. I know I dreamt of it. A lot.

Marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children…. The divine plan of happiness enables family relationships to be perpetuated beyond the grave. Sacred ordinances and covenants available in holy temples make it possible for individuals to return to the presence of God and for families to be united eternally.
The Family: A Proclamation to the World.

So in order to achieve our dreams of Eternal Families, we are strongly encouraged to marry within the Church.

Some people take this very seriously and will not even consider dating outside of the Church. They may demand that the person who is interested in them joins the Church before dating. Others demand it before marriage. But it is not, I repeat, it is NOT a commandment. We are NOT exiled if we marry outside our faith. And we can, in the end, marry whoever the heck we want.

I just wanted Patrick.

He loves me for me, thinks my weirdness is cute, laughs at my jokes, usually, tempers me, and overall just likes the person I am. That’s really all I wanted in a Marriage. Love, respect, like, and communication.

(Post Script: we are not a perfect couple. We are still figuring out the melding of lives and all that. But we want to be together thus we work through our differences via conversations, arguments and marital counseling. We are both way too stubborn for our own good. But social media doesn’t convey that.

Everyone is different.

We all have different wants and needs. Some people need the security of relationships within their belief systems. There is nothing wrong with that.

In fact, that is a HUGE element of our faith. We believe choice is one of the greatest gifts God gave us. Everyone is allowed to make their own choices. Like Patrick and I did. He chose to be a rebel to his social circle and marry a Christian. I chose to marry someone who wasn’t Mormon because I do what I want.

I really hope this article helped answer the question: Can a Mormon marry a Non-Mormon.

And also that it helped shut down any misgivings about the Church. Because as far as I can tell, there are a lot of weird rumors circulating about us because of misunderstanding. Mormons are people with beliefs, just like everyone else.

BONUS:

I forgot to clear up one other weird rumor! People believe that Mormons have to have sex on an altar in the temple for marriage reasons. I don’t really understand who came up with that and why people believe it but we don’t. Simple as that. Some words are shared, an exchange of rings, a sweet kiss, a declaration of husband and wife, and that’s it. Easy. Simple. And usually not very long.

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